The year was 1991, I was about 8 or 9 years old, dolled up in my sister’s make up (which she always told me not to touch) and I remember standing there loving the fact that I could hit (or so I thought at the time) Mariah’s notes while singing the song, except of course I could never hit that high pitch whistle sound she hits (like here), but I could hit all her other ones. I stood there in front of the mirror singing and dancing and skipping the high pitch whistle notes feeling like I was at my own concert. I suddenly hear the living room door close and I quickly run towards the middle section of the stairs. I hide behind the divided wall that separates the stairs case and I see that it’s Carmen getting home. I run back upstairs in a panic licking my hands and using my saliva to wipe off the makeup. I lower the volume on the radio, continue wiping off the make up with my hands and saliva waiting for her to get to our bedroom. She comes in and asks me the question she always asked whenever she was suspicious of me doing something I shouldn’t have been doing “What are you doing?!!” I answer in a calm yet nervous manner “Nothing. Just listening to music.” An occurrence that happened quite often. Sorry sister hehehe!!
So as I grew older, my passion to sing grew stronger and stronger and I really started to get into it when I entered high school. I did talent shows, had a solo in chorus and our Baccalaureate, and sang the National Anthem for a pep rally. I even based my senior project on recording and producing a song. It was a song I originally wrote. Thanks to my other sister Lupe, I had a mentor who was able to provide everything to record and produce my song. Along with my guitar instructor who put music to the song while I sang what I imagined the melody to be.
I always thought I would pursue singing after high school but I knew that the realistic thing to do was to go to college. And so I did. But throughout college and up until my current position post college and working full time, I’ve sang just about every day of my life. Sometimes to annoy others like my niece Marybel or my sister Vanessa haha!! But for the most part, because it’s just what I like to do. Even if I’m down and having a terrible day, I’ll sing a heartbreaking song to go along with my mood or I'll sing in a whisper, but nonetheless sing just to sing.
I’ve written countless songs that never get to have music to them because I can’t afford to pay someone to put music to them and I don’t know how to play instruments; which is currently changing as I am now taking piano and guitar lessons. As of now, I only wish to be good enough on the piano and guitar to be able to sing with my songs. I’m starting off with cover songs which is great practice but eventually I’d like to be able to come up with my own melodies to my own words and hopefully perform them at open mics just to do it for fun. No, I don’t expect to get famous nor do I crave the success that many A-list singers have, it would be nice and I wouldn’t deny it, but that’s not what I want. I just want to be able to sing my songs. One day I will :o)
So everybody knows of the successful show American Idol. Ever since it came out in 2001, people have been telling me to try out. I’ve always been curious to see if I would be able to make it but never had the balls to do it. Every year that they had auditions, I would say to myself “Well, maybe next year.” I don’t know how I got over my fear, but somehow I mustered the courage to finally try out this year. Since their cut off age is 28, I decided to might as well give it a try because I’ve got nothing to lose and it’s my one and only last chance.
The process was long and draining. I had to drive to Petco Park in San Diego (I live in Oceanside – approximately 30 minutes away), register on Wednesday morning and return Friday at 5am. I asked for the day off at work to be able to attend and hopefully change my life. I wasn’t feeling nervous the night before. Instead, I was trying to figure out if the choices of songs I had were good enough. A short conversation with my best friend changed my mind about my song selection. So I followed her advice and chose to do a Faith Hill song. I was browsing around you tube to see which song I could do when I came across a live performance of her song “Stronger.” I immediately fell in love with it. It was 11:15pm that night and I had to wake up at 3am to leave at 4am to be at Petco Park by 5am. It took me about 2 hours to memorize the part of the song I wanted to sing so needless to say I had about an hour and half of sleep. I had only told a few people I was going to do the audition and got encouraging “good luck” texts and phone calls that morning.
When I got there, I was appalled by the $10 and $15 dollar parking fee and since my usual exercise is walking, I decided to park far to avoid paying. Me and thousands of other hopefuls waited outside the stadium sitting on the street waiting to be called. There were strange people, nice people, silly people, and dressed in costumes people on that warm July 8th day. When we finally were lead into the stadium around 8am, we were told that if our water bottle seals were broken, we would have to throw it away. Unfortunately, I had drank mine half way so I had to get rid of it. A young girl in front of me in the security line check asked a guard “Don’t you think it’s kind of ridiculous that your telling us to get rid of our water bottles and we’re all here to sing?!! Nobody told us our bottles couldn’t be opened until we got inside.” The guard just shook his head and let her through without her water bottle.
After a few promotional shots with the camera crew where the crowd shouts “American Idol San Diego!!” the audition process began. We were sitting in our seats according to ticket numbers that were when we registered. The morning wasn’t so bad but as the day went on and the sun got higher, I really began to feel the heat get to me. A lot of people brought umbrellas and I was really wishing I had mine too. I really should have brought mine because I got really burned that day and it really hurt the next day haha!! It was so hot that my throat began to feel dry and I was desperate for hydration!! I, always being broke and never wanting to spend the little money that I do have, gave in and bought an unfairly priced $5 dollar ice tea that tasted gross to sooth my throat. I had been sitting in my seat for over six hours when our section was finally being called. I can’t imagine how much longer the rest of the crowd waited since I registered within the first 3 hours that they allowed. Registration was open for 48 hours and there were still a lot of people registering close to the time limit.
When my section was finally called, we were divided into groups of four and were told to go to whichever tent number was ready. There were approximately 10 to 12 tents aligned down the center of the field and if you got a golden ticket, you’d walk to the right to proceed to another audition and so on. I found out that you eventually audition about 3 times with produces of the show before you are selected to return in November to audition in front of the three celebrity judges when it's filmed. But if you didn’t get a golden ticket, then you’d walk to the left and try for better luck next year. As I stood there in my group of 4, I kept waiting for the nerves to kick in but I was surprisingly calm. I guess I had this “Oh what the hell. Might as well have some fun” kind of attitude which I think really helped me stay calm.
When my group was finally called to tent number 4, I was observing everyone around me. Terrible singers were being turned down as well as amazing singers. I would think to myself
“Wow! That person’s voice gave me goose bumps!! Why would they turn that person down?” When the first two people in my group stepped up for their 30 second audition, they were cut within the first 10 seconds. The third guy got 20 seconds and I’m not gonna lie, I was afraid they were gonna cut me off too. But nonetheless, I stepped up, started singing my song and was surprised to see that they let me finish. I even went over my time limit because my audition piece lasted 40 seconds. In my head, I was like “so, is that a yes?” But no, it was a no haha!! I was given good advice, complimented on my voice, and told that maybe I should return next year. If they raise their age limit to 30, which they’ve done in the past, then I would definitely go back next year when I’m 29. Oh and did I mention that my judge was young gorgeous hot man? No? Oh ok, well he was and I had no trouble singing for him haha!!As I was leaving the stadium, I had completely forgotten where I parked and ended up walking in every opposite direction where my car was. It was approximately 85 or more degrees with no cloud in sight, I was completely dehydrated, and had to pee so bad when I finally gave up searching for my car after 45 minutes and walked into the trolly station next to the stadium. I found the bathroom, leaned over the sink, threw water at my face, drank out of the faucet, collected myself for a few minutes, and finally remembered the name of the street where my car was parked. I asked an employee there where Island Avenue was and he pointed in the only directed I hadn’t looked. Yup, this is just my kind of luck. On my way there, I run into a homeless lady laying down under a tree asking me if I was at Petco Park for the auditions. I said yes and she proceeded to ask me to sing for her. Having renewed my spirit and energy with the short bathroom break I just had, I went ahead and started singing her the song I auditioned. She let me finish and asked “They said no to that? Honey, I would have said yes. You have a beautiful voice.” I kindly thanked her for her sweet compliment and we parted ways. On my way to my car, I ran into other people that looked like would have wanted to steal my purse had I not been really hanging on to it tight and walking fast. I finally got to my car after passing an odd woman shouting loud and offensive obscenities to herself and was ready to go home and take a nap.
I left there not feeling disappointed nor discouraged, but proud of the fact that I finally did it. It was an experience altogether and I definitely don’t regret it. Maybe next time I’ll audition for “The Voice” haha!! But for now, I’ve got my piano, I’ve got my guitar, and I’ve got my voice. What else could I ask for? :o)
Below I posted an extended version of the song I auditioned. It’s called “Stronger” by Faith Hill. Mind the last wanna-be powerful note I tried to hit. I need to practice that a little more haha!! And the following videos are just a few songs I like to sing including a failed duet attempt with mom singing a song in Spanish. Thank you for reading :o)
Oh and I should mention, I don’t have a fancy camera or laptop (laptop is currently broken) to record myself singing, so I use my iphone for now holding it upside down so that I could be able to sing into the receiving end. I’ll eventually put up videos of myself singing in front of the camera as soon as I get my laptop (laptop has a camera in it) fixed and start to upload cover song videos I’ll be working on with my piano and guitar :o) Thanks again for reading and listening :o)
Song I auditioned - "Stronger" by Faith Hill:
Singing "I Found A Boy" by Adele:
Singing "Rumor Has It" by Adele:
And attempting to duet "Amor Eterno" by Rocio Durcal with my mom:
